Shadowland Project
This recording project has been thirty years in the waiting. After several deeply meaningful gifts of encouragement and provision, I stepped into this writing and recording process. I am convinced God has had this time and season in mind all along, born out of years of walking with him through the hills and valleys, much of it in the Shadowland, as I have come to call it. I have clearly seen that God always brings beauty and healing in and around every part of our life and journey if we surrender it to Him. For me, it has resulted in an outpouring of worship through songs I have written along the way and songs that have been deeply meaningful to me personally. I am looking forward to sharing the music and encouragement that has come out of this season, for this time and as a testimony of God's faithful presence.
The first two original songs, Shadowland and By Heart, are followed by the cover singles, Though You Slay Me and Build My Life/'Tis so Sweet.
Down By the Water is the latest original single and all are part of a larger project that will continue to be released over time.
I hope, as you listen and read the stories behind the songs, you will be encouraged to look for God's faithful presence in Your own life.
There is no one like Him.
The first two original songs, Shadowland and By Heart, are followed by the cover singles, Though You Slay Me and Build My Life/'Tis so Sweet.
Down By the Water is the latest original single and all are part of a larger project that will continue to be released over time.
I hope, as you listen and read the stories behind the songs, you will be encouraged to look for God's faithful presence in Your own life.
There is no one like Him.
Shadowland
"I could ask the darkness to hide me and the light around me to become night--but even in darkness I cannot hide from You. To You the night shines as bright as day. Darkness and light are the same to You." Psalm 139:11-12
Life has a way of moving in directions you never intended, taking you to places you could never have imagined from a younger and more naive perspective. When I was a little girl I had mapped out in my mind what my life would look like. The perfect family, how I would meet the man of my dreams in college and marry him shortly after, have two kids in my mid to late 20's, have a nice house and comfortable existence in a place where I would settle down and stay for the rest of my life, growing old with my family and good, lifelong friends nearby.
Not surprisingly, and as is the case with most of us, things haven't worked out the way I had dreamed. As a young girl I watched my father descend into the depths of alcoholism until he left us when I was 12. I saw my mother struggle to hold her heart and our family together. By the time I was 25, after years in search of feeling wanted, I had been through a series of my own dating relationships and painful break-ups that left me feeling that somehow I was never quite enough. While I finally met the man of my dreams at 26 and was married at 27, I spent the first three years of our marriage in a state of suicidal depression and illness due to an undiagnosed brain tumor. Inspite of the odds we were given, we had our son a few years later, but could not have the other children I longed for. I moved ten times in fifteen years, between three states and six cities. I have walked with my husband through debilitating injury and the seasons of resulting chronic pain. I have experienced financial security as well as the stress than comes from long periods of knowing there wasn't near enough to make ends meet. I have experienced the painful ripping apart of the marriages of dear friends and family. I have known the sharp grief of needlessly severed friendships. I have cried an ocean of tears. I have also made selfish and sinful choices. And I have suffered the consequences in some very painful ways.
Much of my life has been spent in what my sister and I refer to as the Shadowland -- a place of overwhelming, pressing darkness. The type of darkness that goes far beyond my general melancholy nature. (She says I am a poster-child for melancholy). Melancholy submitted to the Lord can be a beautiful thing, but left to its own can also lead to deep and desolate darkness. I have spent much time there, sometimes as a result of my own choices and sometimes because of circumstances beyond my control.
Those have been the times, however, that I have grown the most. The times that I have gained the type of wisdom and maturity that can only come from long periods of pain and loss and questioning. Innocence lost and found. The times that God has gotten my attention and caused me to turn toward Him as I have looked up and to the truth of His word. To repent. The times that He has come to my rescue, "around the bend, through the mist." If it weren't for the place of my deep need and darkness, I would never be in a place to discover that Jesus is present in the Shadowland, too.
It's the digging of a deeper well, full of all He is and all He offers by His grace, being poured into my soul--a deeper hope and trust in a steadfast and faithful God who has loved me and healed me, physically and emotionally. He was and is present with me in Shadowland. There really is hope in the midst of darkness because of the deep, profound and unchanging truth that hope is found in Jesus Christ and a life surrendered to Him.
Not surprisingly, and as is the case with most of us, things haven't worked out the way I had dreamed. As a young girl I watched my father descend into the depths of alcoholism until he left us when I was 12. I saw my mother struggle to hold her heart and our family together. By the time I was 25, after years in search of feeling wanted, I had been through a series of my own dating relationships and painful break-ups that left me feeling that somehow I was never quite enough. While I finally met the man of my dreams at 26 and was married at 27, I spent the first three years of our marriage in a state of suicidal depression and illness due to an undiagnosed brain tumor. Inspite of the odds we were given, we had our son a few years later, but could not have the other children I longed for. I moved ten times in fifteen years, between three states and six cities. I have walked with my husband through debilitating injury and the seasons of resulting chronic pain. I have experienced financial security as well as the stress than comes from long periods of knowing there wasn't near enough to make ends meet. I have experienced the painful ripping apart of the marriages of dear friends and family. I have known the sharp grief of needlessly severed friendships. I have cried an ocean of tears. I have also made selfish and sinful choices. And I have suffered the consequences in some very painful ways.
Much of my life has been spent in what my sister and I refer to as the Shadowland -- a place of overwhelming, pressing darkness. The type of darkness that goes far beyond my general melancholy nature. (She says I am a poster-child for melancholy). Melancholy submitted to the Lord can be a beautiful thing, but left to its own can also lead to deep and desolate darkness. I have spent much time there, sometimes as a result of my own choices and sometimes because of circumstances beyond my control.
Those have been the times, however, that I have grown the most. The times that I have gained the type of wisdom and maturity that can only come from long periods of pain and loss and questioning. Innocence lost and found. The times that God has gotten my attention and caused me to turn toward Him as I have looked up and to the truth of His word. To repent. The times that He has come to my rescue, "around the bend, through the mist." If it weren't for the place of my deep need and darkness, I would never be in a place to discover that Jesus is present in the Shadowland, too.
It's the digging of a deeper well, full of all He is and all He offers by His grace, being poured into my soul--a deeper hope and trust in a steadfast and faithful God who has loved me and healed me, physically and emotionally. He was and is present with me in Shadowland. There really is hope in the midst of darkness because of the deep, profound and unchanging truth that hope is found in Jesus Christ and a life surrendered to Him.
Down By the Water
"What is man that you make so much of him, and that you set your heart on him?"
Job 7:17 “He brought me out into a spacious place; he rescued me because he delighted in me.” Psalm 18:19. |
I think most people have a place or space where they feel particularly close to God. Where they hear His voice more clearly, where the beauty or quiet or particular atmosphere brings out the deepest thoughts and emotion, and the deepest communion with Him.
I have always been drawn to the water, and particularly to the ocean. There is something so mysterious and powerful about it that speaks deeply to me. This week in particular, as I have been here and writing this song, the ocean has stopped me in my tracks many times as I’ve walked the shoreline. The sunsets have been no less than captivating. I will never tire of watching the sun go down here, or of seeing everyone on the shoreline stop and catch their breath as they look to the beauty of the setting sun on the horizon. Most don’t recognize the Creator’s painting on the sky over the water, but I never miss it and it inspires deep worship in my heart.
I have come to the coast often since I was a young girl. My dad was a lover of deep-sea fishing and clam digging, so many of our family trips when I was little were spent weekend camping in our motorhome on the Washington coast. When I was in high school, I began coming to the Oregon coast, most often to Cannon Beach. Then in 1991 Boomer and I were invited to sing and lead worship at Cannon Beach Conference Center for a summer family conference. I had no idea that it would be the first of now more than 200 conferences spent on this stretch of beach or that it would change my heart and life in such profound ways. I can mark the seasons of my life as I have returned to the shoreline literally more than a thousand times. I have spent countless hours walking and praying and singing and pondering here at the water’s edge—summer, fall, winter, spring and every season of my life. There is no other place where God has more consistently spoken so clearly to my soul, heard my secrets, calmed my fears, poured peace into my troubled heart, rejoiced with me, delighted in my worship and reminded me of his love and goodness and faithfulness. He always meets me down by the water.
I have always been drawn to the water, and particularly to the ocean. There is something so mysterious and powerful about it that speaks deeply to me. This week in particular, as I have been here and writing this song, the ocean has stopped me in my tracks many times as I’ve walked the shoreline. The sunsets have been no less than captivating. I will never tire of watching the sun go down here, or of seeing everyone on the shoreline stop and catch their breath as they look to the beauty of the setting sun on the horizon. Most don’t recognize the Creator’s painting on the sky over the water, but I never miss it and it inspires deep worship in my heart.
I have come to the coast often since I was a young girl. My dad was a lover of deep-sea fishing and clam digging, so many of our family trips when I was little were spent weekend camping in our motorhome on the Washington coast. When I was in high school, I began coming to the Oregon coast, most often to Cannon Beach. Then in 1991 Boomer and I were invited to sing and lead worship at Cannon Beach Conference Center for a summer family conference. I had no idea that it would be the first of now more than 200 conferences spent on this stretch of beach or that it would change my heart and life in such profound ways. I can mark the seasons of my life as I have returned to the shoreline literally more than a thousand times. I have spent countless hours walking and praying and singing and pondering here at the water’s edge—summer, fall, winter, spring and every season of my life. There is no other place where God has more consistently spoken so clearly to my soul, heard my secrets, calmed my fears, poured peace into my troubled heart, rejoiced with me, delighted in my worship and reminded me of his love and goodness and faithfulness. He always meets me down by the water.
Build My Life/'Tis So Sweet
AVAILABLE NOW (Build My Life/'Tis So Sweet Single)
Apple Music iTunes Amazon Music Spotify Google Play YouTube “Trust in the Lord with all Your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all Your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3:5-6.
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When I first heard this song, I was grieving the death of my mother and navigating my way through some profound concern for people I love as well as some deep, years-long disappointment. I was also coming out of an extended season of non-stop ministry and work and my soul was tired. I was praying for rest and perspective.
God has been so kind to me in that He often brings a new song in the midst of those times when my heart and soul are heavy; one that really moves me to see Him more clearly and to worship Him in a life and heart-changing way. Build My Life showed up in the midst of that season and it was one of those unique songs that the church at times individually and collectively embraces and expresses as their heart’s cry to God. I so find my heart in these words because they express the true heart of worship, which is the foundation of my heart and life: God is worthy of all the praise we could ever bring to Him, every song and even every breath we breathe. Jesus is the Name above every other name and the only One who could ever save us from our sin. Because of that I can trust Him with my life and circumstances, whatever comes. I will not be shaken. And then how beautiful that in the midst of those truths I see His heart and His love for me and for those around me and I am moved to take my eyes off of myself, my grief, my concern and my disappointments and instead look around to those who need to know how much they are loved by God. I can become His hands and feet to a hurting world that needs to trust Him, too.
‘Tis So Sweet to Trust in Jesus is a hymn that I learned as a young girl shortly after I met Jesus, and I have carried it with me for a lifetime. Often when I am facing a difficult or uncertain circumstance I find myself singing this song throughout the day. The words are simple but profound. There are times I don’t have it within myself to completely trust God and I find myself holding tightly to my hurt or concern or fear. But by His grace I can trust Him more. He gives the grace. How I’ve proved Him over and over. There is peace and rest in taking Him at His word when He says I can trust Him.
These two songs often find themselves closely connected in my heart and worship leading, which is why I chose to put them together in this recording. I believe these truths with all my heart. May the expression of my heart in this music and the truth of these words cause you to look to God and find in Him the grace to trust Him more.
God has been so kind to me in that He often brings a new song in the midst of those times when my heart and soul are heavy; one that really moves me to see Him more clearly and to worship Him in a life and heart-changing way. Build My Life showed up in the midst of that season and it was one of those unique songs that the church at times individually and collectively embraces and expresses as their heart’s cry to God. I so find my heart in these words because they express the true heart of worship, which is the foundation of my heart and life: God is worthy of all the praise we could ever bring to Him, every song and even every breath we breathe. Jesus is the Name above every other name and the only One who could ever save us from our sin. Because of that I can trust Him with my life and circumstances, whatever comes. I will not be shaken. And then how beautiful that in the midst of those truths I see His heart and His love for me and for those around me and I am moved to take my eyes off of myself, my grief, my concern and my disappointments and instead look around to those who need to know how much they are loved by God. I can become His hands and feet to a hurting world that needs to trust Him, too.
‘Tis So Sweet to Trust in Jesus is a hymn that I learned as a young girl shortly after I met Jesus, and I have carried it with me for a lifetime. Often when I am facing a difficult or uncertain circumstance I find myself singing this song throughout the day. The words are simple but profound. There are times I don’t have it within myself to completely trust God and I find myself holding tightly to my hurt or concern or fear. But by His grace I can trust Him more. He gives the grace. How I’ve proved Him over and over. There is peace and rest in taking Him at His word when He says I can trust Him.
These two songs often find themselves closely connected in my heart and worship leading, which is why I chose to put them together in this recording. I believe these truths with all my heart. May the expression of my heart in this music and the truth of these words cause you to look to God and find in Him the grace to trust Him more.
By Heart
"And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28
It’s often when you lose a parent or someone close to you that you think about the deeper meaning--the memories (good and bad) and how their life came to shape yours in so many ways. A year or two after my dad died, I found myself in that introspective place and woke up in the middle of the night with memories pouring into my head and heart. Much of it was hard and full of grief beyond the physical loss of my dad. It was grief over years of relationship stolen away, sorrow over the way it shadowed all of my mother’s life and the way it changed the complexion of my life as well as that of my sister. Painful images I had long since pushed to the back of my mind where the harder things were easier to forget. But it was suddenly all so vivid I had to get up at that moment and put it down on paper. The words became a song soon after and is a reflection of my growing-up years.
While this could be a really sad story, I know the ending. It’s colored with sadness for all the innocent years lost, but still full of forgiveness that brings freedom and gratitude—that of my mom and my sister and I, but most of all the forgiveness and grace of God who promises to work everything together for good for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. He gives hope on the darkest nights.
He makes everything new.
While this could be a really sad story, I know the ending. It’s colored with sadness for all the innocent years lost, but still full of forgiveness that brings freedom and gratitude—that of my mom and my sister and I, but most of all the forgiveness and grace of God who promises to work everything together for good for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. He gives hope on the darkest nights.
He makes everything new.
Though You Slay Me
"Though He slay me, I will hope in Him." Job 13:15
"But I trust in You, Lord; I say, "You are my God." My times are in Your hands. Psalm 31:14-15 |
On a cold February evening in 1994 I was lying in an ICU hospital bed, my husband beside me asking God to spare my life. I had survived a pulmonary embolism, but the larger clot was still in my leg and I was in extreme danger of another clot breaking loose. I couldn't take the usual blood thinning medication since it had only been a week since my brain surgery. My doctor told Boomer I may not make it and that he should call family. The questions we had were unspoken. Why would God see us through the three years of debilitating depression and illness only to allow my life to slip away, now that the end of the suffering was in sight? Why now, when we had so much hope for the future and so much to share about God's faithfulness in the hardest of times? I was tired and weak. His energy and emotions were spent. All we knew to do was worship. Boomer slept in a chair next to my bed and I remember Him singing Steven Curtis Chapman's song "His strength is perfect when our strength is gone. He'll carry us when we can't carry on." The words wouldn't leave me during that week in the hospital, waiting for what would come. We chose to worship and to lift up His name from the valley we were in. There were a lot of tears and even more prayers.
God healed me.
That is not the end of every story, I know. Some don't live to see the physical healing. But as I look back at the seasons of my life, I've clearly seen God's plans and purposes evolve--the things we can rarely see in the moment of suffering. Every moment of desperation, every grief, every tear, every baffling circumstance, every agonizing moment has led to a deeper trust and hope in God. A lot of it still makes no sense to me. But because He is faithful and His promises are the only truth I can stand on, I believe Him when He says He loves me. I believe Him when He says He will never leave me or forsake me. I know that I will spend eternity in His presence. Do I love the pain and the struggle? Certainly not. But I love Jesus and know He is walking with me through it all and holding every moment of my life, whatever comes. I now have many stories of His faithfulness to share, born out of suffering and grief. That is how we find Him to be faithful. And more than anything I want my life to point to Him and His faithfulness, whether in life or in death.
Though He slay me, yet I will praise Him.
God healed me.
That is not the end of every story, I know. Some don't live to see the physical healing. But as I look back at the seasons of my life, I've clearly seen God's plans and purposes evolve--the things we can rarely see in the moment of suffering. Every moment of desperation, every grief, every tear, every baffling circumstance, every agonizing moment has led to a deeper trust and hope in God. A lot of it still makes no sense to me. But because He is faithful and His promises are the only truth I can stand on, I believe Him when He says He loves me. I believe Him when He says He will never leave me or forsake me. I know that I will spend eternity in His presence. Do I love the pain and the struggle? Certainly not. But I love Jesus and know He is walking with me through it all and holding every moment of my life, whatever comes. I now have many stories of His faithfulness to share, born out of suffering and grief. That is how we find Him to be faithful. And more than anything I want my life to point to Him and His faithfulness, whether in life or in death.
Though He slay me, yet I will praise Him.
Producer Aaron DoerrAt the beginning of this recording journey, knowing the significance of the help I would need, Pastor/Producer/Arranger Aaron Doerr was the person I wanted to partner with in the making of these songs. He is the Worship Arts Pastor at Rolling Hills Community Church and has been a good friend for many years. He has listened, arranged, produced, recorded, mixed, mastered and listened some more. Countless hours and sacrifice. His musical brilliance, creativity and kind heart have brought beauty and life to the music I have written and that God has laid on my heart as part of this project. A million thanks would not be enough.
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Contributors
Shadowland
Music and Lyrics by Lisa Reiff
Vocals: Lisa Reiff
Orchestration and All Instrumentation by Aaron Doerr
Produced, Arranged and Mixed by Aaron Doerr
Recorded at The Green Room in Tualatin, OR
Mastered by Patricia Sullivan at Bernie Grundman Mastering, Hollywood CA
Cover Graphics: Boomer Reiff
By Heart
Music and Lyrics by Lisa Reiff
Vocals: Lisa Reiff
Pedal Steel Guitar: Paul Brainard
Upright Bass: Ted Swenson
All Other Instrumentation: Aaron Doerr
Produced, Arranged, Engineered and Mixed by Aaron Doerr
Recorded at The Green Room in Tualatin, OR
Mastered by Kimberly Rosen at Knack Mastering in Ringwood, NJ
Cover Graphics: Boomer Reiff
Though You Slay Me
Music and Lyrics by Shane Barnard | Beth Barnard | Lauren Chandler | Brian Woods | Josh Moore
Lead Vocal: Lisa Reiff
Additional Background Vocals: Aaron Doerr and Lisa Reiff
Drums: Daniel Hailey III
Bass Guitar: Chris Chong
Drum Tech: John Harrel
Drums and Bass Recording Engineer: Dean Baskerville
All Other Instrumentation: Aaron Doerr
Produced, Arranged, Engineered and Mixed by Aaron Doerr
Recorded at The Green Room in Tualatin, OR
Mastered by Warren Sokol at United Mastering in Hollywood, CA
Cover Photo and Graphics: Boomer Reiff
Build My Life/'Tis So Sweet
Music and Lyrics by Brett Younker | Karl Martin | Kirby Kaple | Matt Redman | Pat Barrett
Lead Vocal: Lisa Reiff
Additional Background Vocals: Aaron Doerr and Lisa Reiff
Drums: Daniel Hailey III
Bass Guitar: Chris Chong
Drum Tech: John Harrel
Drums and Bass Recording Engineer: Dean Baskerville
All Other Instrumentation: Aaron Doerr
Produced, Arranged, Engineered and Mixed by Aaron Doerr
Recorded at The Green Room in Tualatin, OR
Mastered by Warren Sokol at United Mastering in Hollywood, CA
Cover Graphics: Boomer Reiff
Down by the Water
Music and Lyrics by Lisa Reiff
Lead Vocal: Lisa Reiff
Additional Background Vocals: Aaron Doerr
Piano: Lisa Reiff
All Other Instrumentation: Aaron Doerr
Produced, Arranged, Engineered, Mixed and Mastered by Aaron Doerr
Recorded at The Green Room in Tualatin, OR
Cover Photo: Lisa Reiff
Cover Graphics: Boomer Reiff
Special thanks and deep gratitude to Richard Hall for his deeply meaningful gifts of encouragement and provision
Music and Lyrics by Lisa Reiff
Vocals: Lisa Reiff
Orchestration and All Instrumentation by Aaron Doerr
Produced, Arranged and Mixed by Aaron Doerr
Recorded at The Green Room in Tualatin, OR
Mastered by Patricia Sullivan at Bernie Grundman Mastering, Hollywood CA
Cover Graphics: Boomer Reiff
By Heart
Music and Lyrics by Lisa Reiff
Vocals: Lisa Reiff
Pedal Steel Guitar: Paul Brainard
Upright Bass: Ted Swenson
All Other Instrumentation: Aaron Doerr
Produced, Arranged, Engineered and Mixed by Aaron Doerr
Recorded at The Green Room in Tualatin, OR
Mastered by Kimberly Rosen at Knack Mastering in Ringwood, NJ
Cover Graphics: Boomer Reiff
Though You Slay Me
Music and Lyrics by Shane Barnard | Beth Barnard | Lauren Chandler | Brian Woods | Josh Moore
Lead Vocal: Lisa Reiff
Additional Background Vocals: Aaron Doerr and Lisa Reiff
Drums: Daniel Hailey III
Bass Guitar: Chris Chong
Drum Tech: John Harrel
Drums and Bass Recording Engineer: Dean Baskerville
All Other Instrumentation: Aaron Doerr
Produced, Arranged, Engineered and Mixed by Aaron Doerr
Recorded at The Green Room in Tualatin, OR
Mastered by Warren Sokol at United Mastering in Hollywood, CA
Cover Photo and Graphics: Boomer Reiff
Build My Life/'Tis So Sweet
Music and Lyrics by Brett Younker | Karl Martin | Kirby Kaple | Matt Redman | Pat Barrett
Lead Vocal: Lisa Reiff
Additional Background Vocals: Aaron Doerr and Lisa Reiff
Drums: Daniel Hailey III
Bass Guitar: Chris Chong
Drum Tech: John Harrel
Drums and Bass Recording Engineer: Dean Baskerville
All Other Instrumentation: Aaron Doerr
Produced, Arranged, Engineered and Mixed by Aaron Doerr
Recorded at The Green Room in Tualatin, OR
Mastered by Warren Sokol at United Mastering in Hollywood, CA
Cover Graphics: Boomer Reiff
Down by the Water
Music and Lyrics by Lisa Reiff
Lead Vocal: Lisa Reiff
Additional Background Vocals: Aaron Doerr
Piano: Lisa Reiff
All Other Instrumentation: Aaron Doerr
Produced, Arranged, Engineered, Mixed and Mastered by Aaron Doerr
Recorded at The Green Room in Tualatin, OR
Cover Photo: Lisa Reiff
Cover Graphics: Boomer Reiff
Special thanks and deep gratitude to Richard Hall for his deeply meaningful gifts of encouragement and provision